Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Moods of a 9 year old.

Well, here I am.


Y'all, I am so effing busy ALL THE TIME that I just want to curl up and sleep for days. It's making me feel very........well...... fragile. ( that must be italian! )

I am trying so hard to cope with everything effectively and efficiently. It's working for the most part..... until something doesn't go my way and I lose my shit.




I have class tonight. I have to give an oral report on flash memory. I wrote the report well so I should be able to convey my thoughts vocally.... right? ick. I hate assignmements like this.

J's sister had surgery today. She had her tubes tied. She's not even 30. AND she only has 1 child. It makes me sad. I wish I could convince her otherwise, but nope. I tried. I hope she's doing well.

Other than that, Kevin joined this 2 week tae kwon do class. It's after school and he had his first class yesterday. He LOVED it. The only problem??? He came home and had to do homework. Then we went to get something to eat. Needless to say he got to bed around 8:30, which is later than usual, since they are up at 6am EVERY SINGLE DAY. He was cranky as fuck this morning. Guys, I have no idea what I am doing wrong with him. He is so moody and cranky. I know it's just a phase, but I miss my sweet little boy who used to want to watch TV with me and snuggle. Now I'm lucky if I can pull him away from fighting with his brother and sister long enough to eat dinner. It's making me nuts. NUTS. Last night I was in tears. I am just tired of the fighting and tired of the mouthy responses. I tried blaming Allyn. I mean Kevin only sees his father 2 nights a month. ( not by my choice ) So I called Allyn this morning and had full intentions of talking to him about increasing visitation.... but would that be a good thing???? Allyn tries to get rid of the kids early EVERY time he sees them. Do I really want to push???? Do I want the fight? No, I just want a happy little boy who loves me. That's all.

Is that too much to ask?


Nancy said...

Bribes and punishment. Sigh.

He is now at the bribes and punishment stage.

First figure out what he really, really wants (that isn't TOO expensive) -- then tell him he can have it for Xmas or his birthday -- if he is good AND has a good attitude.

Then remind him every time he has a bad attitude, "I guess you didn't really want x." His bad attitude will "magically" disappear.

Before giving him what he really really wants tell him, "remember, if you have a bad attitude or don't follow the rules, I get to take X away from you." Then remind him ONCE when he has a bad attitude, "If you don't stop, I will take X away. This is your only reminder this week. Next time I just take X."

When the joy of X wears off, which if you pick the right thing will take at least five or six months, start the cycle over with a new X.

Works wonders for me. My daughters would do anything to keep their cell phones as teenagers. My now fourteen year old is getting all A's and B's at school this semester. Why? I bought Jonas Brothers tickets for the end of November. Then I will hold all the concert stuff hostage until Xmas and if her grades still aren't up and the attitude isn't good -- no Xmas stuff from the concert.

Oh, and it doesn't have to be "stuff." "I see you are more mature than your siblings so you get to stay up a 1/2 hour later than them." Or, "I know you are more mature and your little brother and sister can be annoying so I am going to let you go in your bedroom and will keep the other kids out for 1/2 hour a day, if you have a good attitude and prove you can be trusted alone in a room with a shut door, by acting as a young man, not a little kid.

Hope this helps.


Ladiebug said...

I wouldnt worry about getting Kevin to see his dad more. It's just Kevin going through the growing up phaze. Kaila is going thorugh it too. We have to let her be the way she is. Let him know it's Ok to be mad and upset about things. We are constantly talking to Kaila about her moodiness. I hate when I ask her whats wrong and she says nothing. Duh I know soemthing is up you arent smiling and you have this mean face on! Sometimes she looks like she is going to kick my ass! Trying to get her to talk to us, letting her know if she ever wants tot alk we are here for her and have been there. Just constantly let him know this over and over. Never stop letting him know. His body is going through a lot of changes. Just remember he cant always be smiling (sigh I wish) becuase we dont either. I agree with Nacy letting him know he is more mature...sharing his room with Justin has to be annoying at times. He doesnt get any privacy. I am sure he leaves things in certain spots and coems home ot things moved too. Kaila used to want me to let the kids in her room now her room is closed all day and I dont let them in unless she invites them when she is home.

Special K said...

Breathe and let me tell you Cameron was sorta like this at that age too, it is the new hormone thingy. It passes, then they become sullen teenagers and you won't hear a word out of them.
I am with the others, pushing his Dad to see him more when he obviously doesn't want too could make Kevin feel worse, if that is part of what is bothering him. It is better for the sperm donor to keep this up and Kevin will look back and know who the real parent was.
HUGS girly! I know it is frustrating!